fivedayslater (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
fivedayslater) wrote2010-04-02 12:14 am
fivedayslater) wrote2010-04-02 12:14 am
[Fic] The Epic Adventures of Captain Usopp
April 1 is Usopp's birthday, in case you didn't already know. Happy birthday Usopp!
Word Count: 3,140
The sun was shining brightly as Usopp made his way down the coast. The crew was on a new island for the rest of the week and had decided to split up and explore the town and surrounding areas. Everyone was to meet back at the ship by 6:00 tonight to celebrate Usopp’s birthday.
After spending the morning shopping for all of his gadgets with Chopper, the sniper decided to go down to the beach in the afternoon. Some of the locals had told him that the beach was very beautiful during this time of day, one of their natural treasures they claimed, and he wanted to see for himself. He’d brought along some of his brushes and paints, just in case it was as beautiful as they said and he wanted to show Kaya when he got back.
They weren’t lying; the beach was lovely, so he settled down and set up shop to paint, or he would have, if it weren’t for the cry that rang through the air.
Usopp looked around and found a group of…things surrounding what appeared to be a blonde woman. The things looked like giant purple blobs with demon horns and red eyes that breathed fire as they surrounded their defenseless prey. Usopp’s first instinct was to, of course, cry, duck, and cover behind the nearest rock.
“Help me!” the woman screamed. “Please, someone help me! I don’t want them to eat me!”
He peeked out over the rock and saw her crying, pleading for her life with the things. She needed a hero right now.
“Hissatsu Fire Bird Star!” Sogeking shouted as he fired towards the things. Apparently they were quite flammable, as they caught fire easily and ran away shortly after.
“Are you alright Miss?” Sogeking asked when he made his way over to the woman and helped her up.
“Y-yes! Thank you!” She looked exactly like Kaya, Usopp was shocked to notice, but Kaya was back in Syrup Village, studying to become a doctor and waiting for him to come home. What was she doing here?
The woman (who definitely wasn’t Kaya, no matter how similar they looked) gasped as soon as she got a good look at his face. “I-it’s you!”
Maybe it was Kaya after all. Usopp took a few tentative steps back. He wasn’t supposed to see her again until he sailed the world and became a brave warrior.
“I, I mean, we’ve been waiting for you to return for so long…” She smiled at him and ran forward to tackle him into a hug. “We’ve missed you…Sogeking.”
That’s right; he was still wearing the mask. “That’s…very kind of you Miss, but I really must be going-”
“No!” She squeezed him tighter, “you can’t leave just yet! You’ve come to fulfill the prophecy, haven’t you?”
Sogeking was confused. Usopp was twice as confused. “Huh?”
“Come,” Not-Kaya grabbed his wrist and lead him into the nearby forest, “we’ve been waiting for you.”
***
Ayak was apparently the girl’s name. Ayak was her village’s Moon Goddess Priestess, which was a vital role in the village’s survival. She had taken Sogeking through the small village to meet with the elders and other priestesses, the villagers all coming out to gawk and stare and point at him as he passed.
There were six other priestesses. Azodi, who was Fire, was a red-head with brown eyes and a spit fire temper and a blazing personality. Nasyte was Water, and she had blue hair and eyes and was very calm and serene. Celead was Earth. She had green hair and eyes and was very upbeat and chipper. Sopis, who was Sun, was blonde with orange eyes and always needed to be the center of attention. Tiyci was Light, and she was blonde with yellow eyes, bright, and usually very happy. Xysous was Shadow. She had purple hair with matching eyes, was very quiet and very bitter about everything. Zitos and Midoph were the two elders, who were very old. Their personalities were like yin and yang, with Zitos being thick-headed and very aggressive and Midoph being more calm and preferring to think things through.
Which was great and all, but it didn’t really explain why Sogeking was there.
“Sogeking,” Midoph spoke, “Your return to the village is much anticipated and appreciated. Now you can fulfill the prophecy.”
“…what?”
“The prophecy!”Zitos exclaimed, banging a hand on the table. “Surely you must remember the prophecy!?”
“Ah, um, I am quite sorry. I’ve been on so many adventures lately…”
“That’s alright, Sogeking-sama,” Ayak beamed at him. “We’ll gladly tell you the prophecy to refresh your memory.”
“Make it quick!” Zitos barked. The priestesses stood up in a circle and weaved their tale.
Many ages ago, this island was a calm, peaceful utopia. There was plenty of land and food for everyone; everyone was happy and content. Then one day, They came. They spread evil thoughts and feelings throughout the land, causing conflict and strife. Just as our ancestors seemed doomed, a mighty hero named Sogeking appeared. With his divine justice he was able to seal Them away at the cost of his very own life. The seal was doomed to fail eventually, and Sogeking know this. In his final breath, he promised us that if They were ever to return to the world, he would show up once again to save us all.
“So…you think that the ‘Sogeking’ in that prophecy is me?” Sogeking asked.
“Of course it’s you!” Zitos exclaimed, “How many other Sogeking’s do you know?”
There were none, of course, as Usopp had come up with the name spur-of-the-moment on top of a speeding Sea Train in the middle of a raging storm on his way to Enies Lobby as a way to aid the friends he couldn’t face at the time. Coincidences sure are funny sometimes.
“Very sorry, but I’m not exactly sure if you have the right guy here…”
“No, we do,” Midoph said, “We definitely do. Ayak will show you the way to Their lair, were you will proceeded to defeat them once and for all and bring our island to the peace and prosperity it once had.” He nodded and Ayak stepped forward to grab his hand and lead him away again.
“But…”
“Good luck Sogeking-sama!” The priestesses shouted as he was taken away to somewhere unknown.
***
“You know, Ayak-kun,” Sogeking was saying, “There is a town full of people further down the coast…”
“Yes, The Strangers,” she replied. “According to legend, they showed up from beyond the seas after you left. There was an epic battle and we were forced to flee into the forest…but now that you’re back, you can help us regain our lost land!” she beamed at him.
“I was under the impression that I was simply to rid you of them…”
“But…we’ve been waiting so patiently for you to return, Sogeking-sama…” Ayak turned to face him, eyes wide with a look akin to that of a kicked puppy on her face.
Usopp was conflicted. Sogeking was a hero, and heroes helped people in trouble like Ayak right? On the other hand, Usopp was the feared sniper-champion of the very much wanted Strawhat Pirates. If they caused problems on the island, it could mean trouble for their small crew, the famous Marine base on the island would make sure of that.
As such, Usopp played one of the last cards in his deck: the cop out.
“I…will try my best, Ayak-kun. That is all I can promise.”
She seemed satisfied with this answer and continued to lead him into the darkness of the forest.
***
“RARRRG!!” The things surrounding him screeched as the breathed fire.
“Fire Bird Star!” Sogeking shouted, sending them all running away. It’s a wonder their fire-breaths didn’t set themselves on fire, Usopp thought.
“This isn’t getting us very far, Sogeking-sama,” Ayak said. “We need to get into Their headquarters and defeat the Commanders.”
“Where is it, Ayak-kun?”
“Follow me, it’s just up ahead!” She grabbed his hand again and led the way, only to be surrounded by over a hundred things.
“It’s a trap!” Usopp shouted as he proceeded to freak out.
“Calm down, Sogeking-sama!” Ayak pulled on his wrist, effectively shutting him up, “L-let’s see what they want…”
The things parted, revealing a rich-looking blonde man wearing an expensive school uniform of black slacks, white button up, with a periwinkle blazer and matching tie, holding a rose.
“Commander Suoh,” one of the things exclaimed, “The priestess is back, and she brought a friend.”
Suoh looked them over before stopping and staring at Sogeking. “Don’t I know you? You’re nose seems familiar…something about a singing contest perhaps?”
“No, I don’t believe we’ve ever met before.”
“Must be thinking of someone else then.” He sighed before turning to Ayak. “Ah, you’re back again beautiful. Maybe this time you’ll join me for tea and give us what we want?”
“No. This time we’re here to destroy you once and for all,” she declared unflinchingly, which scared Usopp quite a bit, “Where are the others?”
“Back at the base of course,” he handed the rose to her and walked away, “If you want, I can take you to them.”
“Well that was easy,” Sogeking stated.
“Too easy…”
***
Tamaki led them inside of a large system of caves near the back of the island. After many detours and false sliding walls, Sogeking and Ayak found themselves in a small room that could only be a headquarters. The walls were covered with screens displaying the entirety of the little island, including the Ayak’s village and the interior of the Thousand Sunny, among all the other ships in the dock. Impressive, considering the Strawhats had only been there a few short hours…and the ship was supposed to be heavily guarded.
“The den den mushi signal won’t be able to reach here as soon as your ship leaves,” Tamaki explained when he caught Usopp looking, “don’t worry; it’s just a precaution.”
“Precaution against what?”
“Just in case. You can never be too sure.” Usopp then noticed that there were three chairs in front of the screens on the far wall. One was empty, presumably the missing commander’s, while the other two were turned away from the door, facing the screens in a way so their faces couldn’t be seen. The voice came from the chair in the middle.
“Resistance is futile,” the chair on the right said, “You should just give us what we want now, Ayak.”
“I’ll never give in!” She declared, “Not to the likes of you.”
“Is that so?”
The two chairs turned to face their guests. In the center chair was a large man with short, dirty-blonde hair with a piece sticking up in front and sky blue eyes behind a pair of glasses. He was wearing a kaki military uniform complete with combat boots and a brown leather jacket, sitting cross legged in his chair. The man on the right was rather scrawny with black hair sticking up everywhere, pale skin, and black circles under his eyes. He was wearing only jeans and a white t-shirt, and had his feet on his chair.
“America, L,” Tamaki addressed them as he sat in his seat as well, “What should we do with them?”
“We need Ayak,” L said, eating some cake that appeared out of nowhere, “The other is of no use to us though. Have Them put him away somewhere until we’re done.”
“No! You won’t get away with this!” Ayak shouted, “Get them now, Sogeking-sama! Finish this once and for all!”
“R-right…” Just as he brought up his Kabuto however, L sprang from his seat and delivered a strong kick to Usopp’s hand, forcing him to drop the slingshot. At the same time, America swiftly jumped up and pulled out a gun the likes of which Usopp had never seen and pointed it steadily at them.
“My friend here is a really good shot,” Suoh was saying, “I wouldn’t if I were you…”
“Wh-what do you fiends want with Ayak-kun?” Sogeking said as he moved between America’s gun and Ayak. Usopp’s knees were visibly shaking the whole time.
“It’s nothing really,” L was saying as he twirled his fork in the air after returning to his seat, “Honestly, it was a rather large mistake on your part, but we’d just like to go home now.”
“Go…home?” Usopp questioned.
“Yeah,” America stood up, still keeping the gun trained at them, but not nearly as threatening as before, “I mean, I’m in the middle of WWII right now, so I really do need to go back. It’ll be bad if my side loses.”
“I’m in the middle of the climax!” Tamaki dramatically stated, “You can’t take the main character away in the middle of the climax!”
“I don’t have a pressing need to get home, to be honest,” L said, “but that doesn’t mean I want to be here.”
“Um…what?”
“Don’t listen to them Sogeking-sama!” Ayak shouted, clutching at his shoulder. “They’re pure evil! They came here to ally themselves with Them and to try and wipe my people out!”
“Not really,” Tamaki said, playing with his rose, “you accidently summoned us here while trying to get your ‘Sogeking.’ Its fine, an honest mistake to be sure Princess, but you refused to send us back…”
“So we decided to join forces with Them in an attempt to find our own way home,” America explained, “turns out they were pretty cool though. They’ve actually been trying to make peace with you for hundreds of years, but you keep shunning them and beating them up…”
“Rather pointless if you ask me,” L stated, “as They are very peaceful and wouldn’t harm a fly. The problem is that They told us the only way back home is through you, and you all have been most uncooperative with that.”
“D-don’t listen to them Sogeking-sama!” Ayak pulled on his arm, practically begging, “They’re lying! We didn’t try to summon you because w-we always knew you’d come back! C-clearly they’re lying! They attacked us first! You have to defeat them now Sogeking-sama!”
“I don’t know…what these guys are saying does make sense…”
“No it doesn’t! How can anything that breaths fire and look like They do come in peace?! We have to wipe them out, and we have to do it by destroying the Intruders!”
“Their fire is perfectly harmless,” L stated, “You’d probably know this if you actually tried to talk to them ever.”
“And it’s not our fault we intruded or whatever,” America said, “You’re the ones who kidnapped us.”
“Please Princess,” Tamaki smiled at her, “We really do just want to go home now.”
“Ayak-kun,” Sogeking turned to her and asked, “Is this true? I don’t mind that you attempted to call me here instead of waiting, but if you really did grab these three from their homes, it’s only fair that you return them.”
“N-no! Th-they’re lying! W-we didn’t…i-it wasn’t…s-stop looking at me like that!” she lunged forward and snatched Kabuto from the floor where Sogeking dropped it before and aimed it at its owner’s face. “I’m sorry Sogeking-sama, but if you won’t fulfill your prophecy willingly, then I’ll have to make you-”
While she was just getting into her monologue, Tamaki, America, and L triple teamed her, managing to take her down and disarm her in one go.
“Ayak-kun,” Sogeking said when he retrieved Kabuto, “It is my belief that you should let them go home.”
“I-it’s not my d-decision…e-everybody agreed…this was for the best…”
“So we use her as a hostage,” L concluded, “She’s high ranking enough that we’d get what we wanted, and if their hero Sogeking backs us up, they shouldn’t try to stand against us.”
“Are you mad?! We can’t use her as a hostage!” Tamaki exclaimed, “She’s a lady! That’s quite rude!”
“Well we have to do something, I want to go home.” America had finished tying Ayak up and slung her over his shoulder. “What L said makes sense, so I say we do that.”
“Commanders!” one of the things ran in and shouted, “We have a problem! The Villagers are attacking!”
“That makes things easier,” L stated, “they’ve come to us.”
“Cool that means we don’t have to take hostages!” America turned to address the thing, “Bring the other priestesses and the elders in here.” The thing ran off to do what it was told.
“Isn’t that taking even more hostages…?” Usopp wondered aloud.
“Whatever.”
The priestesses and the elders were brought forward, and after much kicking, screaming, and general stubbornness from them, and some explaining and threatening from Sogeking, they gave in and set up the portal to send Tamaki and America home.
“Actually, I don’t want to go home right now,” L decided at the last minute, “I think I’ll stay here for a while longer.”
“You fools!” Zitos shouted, “You’ve done yourselves in! Without your commanders there is nothing to stop us from winning this fight once and for all!”
“None of that now, Elder-kun,” Sogeking stated, “L and I have been talking, and we’ve come up with a plan of action that will bring about peace between your village and Them…”
***
“And that’s why I was late coming back to the ship today,” Usopp ended his tale with a flourish.
“Wow really?!” Chopper said, “That’s so cool!”
“Yeah!” Luffy agreed, “I don’t mind having dinner a little late if you were off bringing about an everlasting peace!”
“You two are morons,” Zoro stated, “he’s clearly lying.”
“What really?!”
“I am not! That’s really what happened!”
“I’m willing to forget about it for today,” Nami said, “but next time the standard Late Fee will be double enforced if you pull something like this again.”
“But-”
“Part of Long nose-kun’s story is true at any rate,” Robin said, a smile on her face, “The beach is rather lovely in the afternoon.”
“It’s all true I tell you!”
“I dunno,” Franky said, “I was looking for some more lumber in town, and all of the locals said that they had to import it. Plus I didn’t see any forest on the island.”
“It was there I tell you!”
“Yohoho! I see your tales are as fantastic as ever, Usopp-san. Of course, I have no eyes, so I can’t really see! SKULL JOKE!!”
“Brook, I tell you it actually-”
“Whatever you say shithead,” Sanji placed the finishing touches on the cake he’d been prepared and brought it over to the table. He cut a large slice and placed it in front of Usopp, “just eat your cake. I had to go through extra effort to keep Luffy away since you showed up late, so you better appreciate this.”
He did, and it was delicious. All in all, it had been one of his better birthdays.
Word Count: 3,140
The sun was shining brightly as Usopp made his way down the coast. The crew was on a new island for the rest of the week and had decided to split up and explore the town and surrounding areas. Everyone was to meet back at the ship by 6:00 tonight to celebrate Usopp’s birthday.
After spending the morning shopping for all of his gadgets with Chopper, the sniper decided to go down to the beach in the afternoon. Some of the locals had told him that the beach was very beautiful during this time of day, one of their natural treasures they claimed, and he wanted to see for himself. He’d brought along some of his brushes and paints, just in case it was as beautiful as they said and he wanted to show Kaya when he got back.
They weren’t lying; the beach was lovely, so he settled down and set up shop to paint, or he would have, if it weren’t for the cry that rang through the air.
Usopp looked around and found a group of…things surrounding what appeared to be a blonde woman. The things looked like giant purple blobs with demon horns and red eyes that breathed fire as they surrounded their defenseless prey. Usopp’s first instinct was to, of course, cry, duck, and cover behind the nearest rock.
“Help me!” the woman screamed. “Please, someone help me! I don’t want them to eat me!”
He peeked out over the rock and saw her crying, pleading for her life with the things. She needed a hero right now.
“Hissatsu Fire Bird Star!” Sogeking shouted as he fired towards the things. Apparently they were quite flammable, as they caught fire easily and ran away shortly after.
“Are you alright Miss?” Sogeking asked when he made his way over to the woman and helped her up.
“Y-yes! Thank you!” She looked exactly like Kaya, Usopp was shocked to notice, but Kaya was back in Syrup Village, studying to become a doctor and waiting for him to come home. What was she doing here?
The woman (who definitely wasn’t Kaya, no matter how similar they looked) gasped as soon as she got a good look at his face. “I-it’s you!”
Maybe it was Kaya after all. Usopp took a few tentative steps back. He wasn’t supposed to see her again until he sailed the world and became a brave warrior.
“I, I mean, we’ve been waiting for you to return for so long…” She smiled at him and ran forward to tackle him into a hug. “We’ve missed you…Sogeking.”
That’s right; he was still wearing the mask. “That’s…very kind of you Miss, but I really must be going-”
“No!” She squeezed him tighter, “you can’t leave just yet! You’ve come to fulfill the prophecy, haven’t you?”
Sogeking was confused. Usopp was twice as confused. “Huh?”
“Come,” Not-Kaya grabbed his wrist and lead him into the nearby forest, “we’ve been waiting for you.”
***
Ayak was apparently the girl’s name. Ayak was her village’s Moon Goddess Priestess, which was a vital role in the village’s survival. She had taken Sogeking through the small village to meet with the elders and other priestesses, the villagers all coming out to gawk and stare and point at him as he passed.
There were six other priestesses. Azodi, who was Fire, was a red-head with brown eyes and a spit fire temper and a blazing personality. Nasyte was Water, and she had blue hair and eyes and was very calm and serene. Celead was Earth. She had green hair and eyes and was very upbeat and chipper. Sopis, who was Sun, was blonde with orange eyes and always needed to be the center of attention. Tiyci was Light, and she was blonde with yellow eyes, bright, and usually very happy. Xysous was Shadow. She had purple hair with matching eyes, was very quiet and very bitter about everything. Zitos and Midoph were the two elders, who were very old. Their personalities were like yin and yang, with Zitos being thick-headed and very aggressive and Midoph being more calm and preferring to think things through.
Which was great and all, but it didn’t really explain why Sogeking was there.
“Sogeking,” Midoph spoke, “Your return to the village is much anticipated and appreciated. Now you can fulfill the prophecy.”
“…what?”
“The prophecy!”Zitos exclaimed, banging a hand on the table. “Surely you must remember the prophecy!?”
“Ah, um, I am quite sorry. I’ve been on so many adventures lately…”
“That’s alright, Sogeking-sama,” Ayak beamed at him. “We’ll gladly tell you the prophecy to refresh your memory.”
“Make it quick!” Zitos barked. The priestesses stood up in a circle and weaved their tale.
Many ages ago, this island was a calm, peaceful utopia. There was plenty of land and food for everyone; everyone was happy and content. Then one day, They came. They spread evil thoughts and feelings throughout the land, causing conflict and strife. Just as our ancestors seemed doomed, a mighty hero named Sogeking appeared. With his divine justice he was able to seal Them away at the cost of his very own life. The seal was doomed to fail eventually, and Sogeking know this. In his final breath, he promised us that if They were ever to return to the world, he would show up once again to save us all.
“So…you think that the ‘Sogeking’ in that prophecy is me?” Sogeking asked.
“Of course it’s you!” Zitos exclaimed, “How many other Sogeking’s do you know?”
There were none, of course, as Usopp had come up with the name spur-of-the-moment on top of a speeding Sea Train in the middle of a raging storm on his way to Enies Lobby as a way to aid the friends he couldn’t face at the time. Coincidences sure are funny sometimes.
“Very sorry, but I’m not exactly sure if you have the right guy here…”
“No, we do,” Midoph said, “We definitely do. Ayak will show you the way to Their lair, were you will proceeded to defeat them once and for all and bring our island to the peace and prosperity it once had.” He nodded and Ayak stepped forward to grab his hand and lead him away again.
“But…”
“Good luck Sogeking-sama!” The priestesses shouted as he was taken away to somewhere unknown.
***
“You know, Ayak-kun,” Sogeking was saying, “There is a town full of people further down the coast…”
“Yes, The Strangers,” she replied. “According to legend, they showed up from beyond the seas after you left. There was an epic battle and we were forced to flee into the forest…but now that you’re back, you can help us regain our lost land!” she beamed at him.
“I was under the impression that I was simply to rid you of them…”
“But…we’ve been waiting so patiently for you to return, Sogeking-sama…” Ayak turned to face him, eyes wide with a look akin to that of a kicked puppy on her face.
Usopp was conflicted. Sogeking was a hero, and heroes helped people in trouble like Ayak right? On the other hand, Usopp was the feared sniper-champion of the very much wanted Strawhat Pirates. If they caused problems on the island, it could mean trouble for their small crew, the famous Marine base on the island would make sure of that.
As such, Usopp played one of the last cards in his deck: the cop out.
“I…will try my best, Ayak-kun. That is all I can promise.”
She seemed satisfied with this answer and continued to lead him into the darkness of the forest.
***
“RARRRG!!” The things surrounding him screeched as the breathed fire.
“Fire Bird Star!” Sogeking shouted, sending them all running away. It’s a wonder their fire-breaths didn’t set themselves on fire, Usopp thought.
“This isn’t getting us very far, Sogeking-sama,” Ayak said. “We need to get into Their headquarters and defeat the Commanders.”
“Where is it, Ayak-kun?”
“Follow me, it’s just up ahead!” She grabbed his hand again and led the way, only to be surrounded by over a hundred things.
“It’s a trap!” Usopp shouted as he proceeded to freak out.
“Calm down, Sogeking-sama!” Ayak pulled on his wrist, effectively shutting him up, “L-let’s see what they want…”
The things parted, revealing a rich-looking blonde man wearing an expensive school uniform of black slacks, white button up, with a periwinkle blazer and matching tie, holding a rose.
“Commander Suoh,” one of the things exclaimed, “The priestess is back, and she brought a friend.”
Suoh looked them over before stopping and staring at Sogeking. “Don’t I know you? You’re nose seems familiar…something about a singing contest perhaps?”
“No, I don’t believe we’ve ever met before.”
“Must be thinking of someone else then.” He sighed before turning to Ayak. “Ah, you’re back again beautiful. Maybe this time you’ll join me for tea and give us what we want?”
“No. This time we’re here to destroy you once and for all,” she declared unflinchingly, which scared Usopp quite a bit, “Where are the others?”
“Back at the base of course,” he handed the rose to her and walked away, “If you want, I can take you to them.”
“Well that was easy,” Sogeking stated.
“Too easy…”
***
Tamaki led them inside of a large system of caves near the back of the island. After many detours and false sliding walls, Sogeking and Ayak found themselves in a small room that could only be a headquarters. The walls were covered with screens displaying the entirety of the little island, including the Ayak’s village and the interior of the Thousand Sunny, among all the other ships in the dock. Impressive, considering the Strawhats had only been there a few short hours…and the ship was supposed to be heavily guarded.
“The den den mushi signal won’t be able to reach here as soon as your ship leaves,” Tamaki explained when he caught Usopp looking, “don’t worry; it’s just a precaution.”
“Precaution against what?”
“Just in case. You can never be too sure.” Usopp then noticed that there were three chairs in front of the screens on the far wall. One was empty, presumably the missing commander’s, while the other two were turned away from the door, facing the screens in a way so their faces couldn’t be seen. The voice came from the chair in the middle.
“Resistance is futile,” the chair on the right said, “You should just give us what we want now, Ayak.”
“I’ll never give in!” She declared, “Not to the likes of you.”
“Is that so?”
The two chairs turned to face their guests. In the center chair was a large man with short, dirty-blonde hair with a piece sticking up in front and sky blue eyes behind a pair of glasses. He was wearing a kaki military uniform complete with combat boots and a brown leather jacket, sitting cross legged in his chair. The man on the right was rather scrawny with black hair sticking up everywhere, pale skin, and black circles under his eyes. He was wearing only jeans and a white t-shirt, and had his feet on his chair.
“America, L,” Tamaki addressed them as he sat in his seat as well, “What should we do with them?”
“We need Ayak,” L said, eating some cake that appeared out of nowhere, “The other is of no use to us though. Have Them put him away somewhere until we’re done.”
“No! You won’t get away with this!” Ayak shouted, “Get them now, Sogeking-sama! Finish this once and for all!”
“R-right…” Just as he brought up his Kabuto however, L sprang from his seat and delivered a strong kick to Usopp’s hand, forcing him to drop the slingshot. At the same time, America swiftly jumped up and pulled out a gun the likes of which Usopp had never seen and pointed it steadily at them.
“My friend here is a really good shot,” Suoh was saying, “I wouldn’t if I were you…”
“Wh-what do you fiends want with Ayak-kun?” Sogeking said as he moved between America’s gun and Ayak. Usopp’s knees were visibly shaking the whole time.
“It’s nothing really,” L was saying as he twirled his fork in the air after returning to his seat, “Honestly, it was a rather large mistake on your part, but we’d just like to go home now.”
“Go…home?” Usopp questioned.
“Yeah,” America stood up, still keeping the gun trained at them, but not nearly as threatening as before, “I mean, I’m in the middle of WWII right now, so I really do need to go back. It’ll be bad if my side loses.”
“I’m in the middle of the climax!” Tamaki dramatically stated, “You can’t take the main character away in the middle of the climax!”
“I don’t have a pressing need to get home, to be honest,” L said, “but that doesn’t mean I want to be here.”
“Um…what?”
“Don’t listen to them Sogeking-sama!” Ayak shouted, clutching at his shoulder. “They’re pure evil! They came here to ally themselves with Them and to try and wipe my people out!”
“Not really,” Tamaki said, playing with his rose, “you accidently summoned us here while trying to get your ‘Sogeking.’ Its fine, an honest mistake to be sure Princess, but you refused to send us back…”
“So we decided to join forces with Them in an attempt to find our own way home,” America explained, “turns out they were pretty cool though. They’ve actually been trying to make peace with you for hundreds of years, but you keep shunning them and beating them up…”
“Rather pointless if you ask me,” L stated, “as They are very peaceful and wouldn’t harm a fly. The problem is that They told us the only way back home is through you, and you all have been most uncooperative with that.”
“D-don’t listen to them Sogeking-sama!” Ayak pulled on his arm, practically begging, “They’re lying! We didn’t try to summon you because w-we always knew you’d come back! C-clearly they’re lying! They attacked us first! You have to defeat them now Sogeking-sama!”
“I don’t know…what these guys are saying does make sense…”
“No it doesn’t! How can anything that breaths fire and look like They do come in peace?! We have to wipe them out, and we have to do it by destroying the Intruders!”
“Their fire is perfectly harmless,” L stated, “You’d probably know this if you actually tried to talk to them ever.”
“And it’s not our fault we intruded or whatever,” America said, “You’re the ones who kidnapped us.”
“Please Princess,” Tamaki smiled at her, “We really do just want to go home now.”
“Ayak-kun,” Sogeking turned to her and asked, “Is this true? I don’t mind that you attempted to call me here instead of waiting, but if you really did grab these three from their homes, it’s only fair that you return them.”
“N-no! Th-they’re lying! W-we didn’t…i-it wasn’t…s-stop looking at me like that!” she lunged forward and snatched Kabuto from the floor where Sogeking dropped it before and aimed it at its owner’s face. “I’m sorry Sogeking-sama, but if you won’t fulfill your prophecy willingly, then I’ll have to make you-”
While she was just getting into her monologue, Tamaki, America, and L triple teamed her, managing to take her down and disarm her in one go.
“Ayak-kun,” Sogeking said when he retrieved Kabuto, “It is my belief that you should let them go home.”
“I-it’s not my d-decision…e-everybody agreed…this was for the best…”
“So we use her as a hostage,” L concluded, “She’s high ranking enough that we’d get what we wanted, and if their hero Sogeking backs us up, they shouldn’t try to stand against us.”
“Are you mad?! We can’t use her as a hostage!” Tamaki exclaimed, “She’s a lady! That’s quite rude!”
“Well we have to do something, I want to go home.” America had finished tying Ayak up and slung her over his shoulder. “What L said makes sense, so I say we do that.”
“Commanders!” one of the things ran in and shouted, “We have a problem! The Villagers are attacking!”
“That makes things easier,” L stated, “they’ve come to us.”
“Cool that means we don’t have to take hostages!” America turned to address the thing, “Bring the other priestesses and the elders in here.” The thing ran off to do what it was told.
“Isn’t that taking even more hostages…?” Usopp wondered aloud.
“Whatever.”
The priestesses and the elders were brought forward, and after much kicking, screaming, and general stubbornness from them, and some explaining and threatening from Sogeking, they gave in and set up the portal to send Tamaki and America home.
“Actually, I don’t want to go home right now,” L decided at the last minute, “I think I’ll stay here for a while longer.”
“You fools!” Zitos shouted, “You’ve done yourselves in! Without your commanders there is nothing to stop us from winning this fight once and for all!”
“None of that now, Elder-kun,” Sogeking stated, “L and I have been talking, and we’ve come up with a plan of action that will bring about peace between your village and Them…”
***
“And that’s why I was late coming back to the ship today,” Usopp ended his tale with a flourish.
“Wow really?!” Chopper said, “That’s so cool!”
“Yeah!” Luffy agreed, “I don’t mind having dinner a little late if you were off bringing about an everlasting peace!”
“You two are morons,” Zoro stated, “he’s clearly lying.”
“What really?!”
“I am not! That’s really what happened!”
“I’m willing to forget about it for today,” Nami said, “but next time the standard Late Fee will be double enforced if you pull something like this again.”
“But-”
“Part of Long nose-kun’s story is true at any rate,” Robin said, a smile on her face, “The beach is rather lovely in the afternoon.”
“It’s all true I tell you!”
“I dunno,” Franky said, “I was looking for some more lumber in town, and all of the locals said that they had to import it. Plus I didn’t see any forest on the island.”
“It was there I tell you!”
“Yohoho! I see your tales are as fantastic as ever, Usopp-san. Of course, I have no eyes, so I can’t really see! SKULL JOKE!!”
“Brook, I tell you it actually-”
“Whatever you say shithead,” Sanji placed the finishing touches on the cake he’d been prepared and brought it over to the table. He cut a large slice and placed it in front of Usopp, “just eat your cake. I had to go through extra effort to keep Luffy away since you showed up late, so you better appreciate this.”
He did, and it was delicious. All in all, it had been one of his better birthdays.